Highlights

Here are highlights from today:

• Creeped out by how much my kids like grapefruit. There knowledge of how to prepare it, eat it, and thank God for it is weird to me.
• After two days of absolute no listening, number 2 asked to come out of the room this morning, got dressed without being asked, reminded everyone to thank God for their food, asked to be excused every time he needed to leave the table, was in his coat and boots when he heard it was time to leave and said thank you mom. Wow, this one goes in the books!
• Doctor says number 3 is way beyond her development level. I need to watch out for independence, thinking she is bigger than she is, and trying things she isn’t ready for or capable of. No kidding, really?
• While also being beyond her skill level in some areas, number 3 also has decided to stop using her hands to eat and sticks her face to the table and eats like an animal. Awesome. Trade one skill for another I guess.
• Number 1 wore a batman costume all day. I didn’t care.
• I let number 1 and 2 cover their feet in marker so it looked like socks. I didn’t care. It will eventually come off right?
• Discovered that my website was done. Seriously, I have been working on this for over a year and wasn’t sure I could see it happen. I am so thankful for Jon in helping me. It is a rejoicing kind of day.
* Batman beat out Jesus today in superpowers. Jesus didn't raise the dead dog from the dead, batman just did CPR.
* Number 3 is the big bad baby who eats everyone in the village. All superhero's must save the people from her. Poor girl is going to have a complex some day.
• Worked really hard, wrote more notes and outlines for my talk tonight than I usually do. Was feeling awesome about my talk. Got new ink to print it off and left it on my coffee table when I left the house. Seriously? I totally spoke without a net tonight and it freaked me out. I prayed and prayed, God be my words, and he did. I have no idea what I said, so not sure how it went.
• Took all three kids to my speaking event. At the end, number 1 decided to give away as merchandise as I sold. We have to work on his business skills.
• On the way home the kids and I decided that they should host their own show like the brothers on their favorite show Zabomafoo. They decided their show was going to be hosted in superhero costumes. The top ideas of their superhero names are:
o Super sense – the ability to sense evil and fight for good. Also works to have great long lashes to help with seeing
o Pajama boy – fights crime at night while sneaking out of bed
o Girl brother – half boy half girl. Not sure what kind of superpower that is, but hey they’ll figure it out.
o Heart man – he throws hearts and his whole costume is a heart cause he cares so much about people. He loves them to death.

• Oh man these were crazy. Still working on what the daily show would look like, but we can figure that out tomorrow.
• When I have a crazy day and can’t think straight, instead of yelling at the top of my lungs, or quietly meditating, I like to listen to music as loud as humanly possible. Somehow it feels like the loudness pulls out the angst and frustration and crazy. It’s not spiritual, but man it makes me feel better.
• Mmmmm….a cup of coffee and an hour out of the house at Spyhouse. My day is good.

Conversations

This past weekend I got to speak with a really great friend of mine, Henry Graf. What I love about speaking with Henry is that we have tried to create a conversation style presentation when we are on stage. From almost the beginning of our friendship, Henry and I have had great conversations. We talk about family, life, struggles, but mainly, what God is teaching us in life. It's amazing because I didn't really talk this way with many friends, but I did with Henry. Henry and I don't see each other very often, but when we do, we get deep real quick. We have humor enough to share, and we do, but what I appreciate about our conversations is how real they are.

My friend Lindsey picked me and Lulu up from the airport on Sunday after the event. We were sharing about our weekends and all that was going on in our lives. At one point, my friend was sharing about how she wasn't honoring God with how she lived this past week. I was taken aback by her statement. Had I even thought about that at all? Was the way I was choosing to live my life honoring God this past week or weekend? Without even knowing it, she spoke truth into my life and challenged me to dig deeper.

Throughout my life I have noticed how much conversations have enriched, encouraged, challenged, and spoken wisdom into my life. Conversations hold the power to uplift or tear you down. To leave you feeling encouraged, or empty. Conversations I have valued the most are those that always point me back to the Lord unintentionally. Its just talking with friends about life. What is difficult, challenging, etc, and there my friend will sit and speak love and encouragement to me. They speak Jesus into my life.

I found myself very blessed lately to have many of these conversations. I have noticed that I have some incredible people I have in my life; friends that are seeking God daily. So many that speak encouragement and truth into our conversations. It has also taught me to listen and learn from our times together.

I have also noticed how many people are really terrible at conversation. Very often I find myself being the only one asking questions about the other person. (in which case its more like an interview) What’s going on in their life, how are things going, etc. What I have found is that there are quite a lot of people who don’t ask anything about me. They either don’t care or don’t know how to ask. And then if they do ask, the only questions are surface questions. I am saddened to think of how many people I know that are really terrible at conversations.

When people list all the ways that God speaks into your life; the Bible, prayer, church, etc., don’t ever belittle the community of God. The conversations that happen when we talk and listen to other believers. Many conversations in our days, weeks and months exist with no real depth, meaning, listening, or encouragement. But my prayer is that we can dig deeper with other believers, friends and family. We can talk about things that we never have before. Find truth and freedom in our faith and in our relationships. It is amazing how God teaches us through conversation.

It brings me back to speaking with Henry. Because of this reason we have chosen to have a conversation from stage and the last month has shown me how much people can relate to that. That they enjoy listening to a conversation that digs deeper, and prayerfully will make them want it for their lives.

The adventure begins

OK Folks,

10 bags packed!

Kitchen cleaned.

Bathroom cleaned.

Five people bathed, nails clipped, hair straight. (well sort of.)

Rides to the airport arranged.

Four babysitters are prepared.

Notes from mom and hot chocolate packed for winter adventures for the kiddos.

All the laundry done and clean sheets on the beds.

Mother-in-law flying out to see me in Indy! yay for surprises.

This weekend, all five of us will be somewhere different. (Well, I guess Lu will be with me.) Its exciting. The kids get special sleepovers and probably more treats and TV than mom usually allows. Who wouldn't like that right?

Paul gets to go to camp and do music with his band. He is excited for slightly warmer temps, camping, playing music and broom ball. I think.

I get to take Lu with me and head on a plane today to Indy. I get to hang out with 350 Junior Highers, speak with my dear friend Henry Graf, and get to work with Cathy Pino, Beckie Alborn and Katie Ernst. Holy Cow I am excited for my weekend.

Noah gets to spend the night with his friend Kieran and then off to his other family, the Hoods to meet up with Caleb. This is after their babysitter today takes them to a dance competetion. Oh my. They will have stories when I come home.

When we are all together after a weekend away, my favorite thing is sitting down and telling stories. I will share some of those stories with you when I return. Until then, have a great weekend. Check my facebook for weekend updates and photo's.

Slow Down

I get that my life is crazy. I do a lot of traveling, I am a part of a mission project, I have a public speaking ministry, I am a mother, wife, friend, daughter, sister, neighbor, citizen, and it makes life hectic. In each of those roles, there are responsibilities, bills, relationships, cleaning, maintenance, etc. But don't we all have that on our plate in some way? Isn't the common response to "How are you?" "Busy, but OK, or Busy but good." Busy is the new fine.

Being busy is normal, we've made it normal, and we are all trying to figure out how not to be so busy. (Maybe like we're all trying to figure out how to diet and loose a little extra weight.) I don't even like saying that I'm busy anymore because I can't get any sympathy. I'm in the same boat as everyone else.

But is there a way to stop the cycle? To really slow down and change the way we do life? Aren't we in complete control of our schedule? We are the ones who say yes or no to the opportunities presented to us.

The last few months my family has tried to slowed down. I was that person who had play dates a few times a week. We were going all the time to do this or do that. I had a hard time staying home and I thought it was fun. I was doing all these great things with my kids. Fun activities, and educational outings. But we were going all the time. We were loosing the art of just being together. Learning that we don't have to go from one activity to the next. In taking that much of life, its almost like you miss out on it.

You know, in slowing down, I have noticed a few things.
* I have so much more patience with my kids. I'm not as stressed out, so there is more time to teach, be calm and show my kids a better way to behave. (By that I mean, I'm not yelling all the time, just half the time.) :)
* We have more time for reading, talking, dancing, and just being together.
* My kids have learned how to be content without constant activity. They can play nicely on their own (still with normal sibling fights), but even more than that, they use so much imagination to make up things to do without my direction.
* Because we are home more and just around each other, my kids have this freedom to ask incredible questions and we get such great conversations.
* With slowing down at home, I have found that my expect ions regarding life have changed. It isn't about how much I get done (I do still struggle with this), but the relationships I am in. My husband and I are stronger and closer than we've ever been.
* Bedtime is calm and full of snuggles and songs.
* Life has more peace. I care less about what I'm missing out on.
* I have energy to get up and do devotions in the morning. I have time to really seek God's counsel in my life.
* My house isn't any cleaner, but I don't care anymore. (OK, most of the time anyway.)

I know we are busy. I know its hard to learn to say no. I still really struggle with that. It's even harder to say no to good things. Great things. Amazing opportunities. But what would it look like if we set up boundaries for our life. To protect the things we care most about? How much activities will we say yes and no to? How many nights will we spend out of the house? When will we get family time?

We are in complete control of how busy we are, so if you don't like it, try to make a better choice. The rewards are worth it.

I used to run around and do all sorts of fun things I think partly because I didn't want to be home. I thought that communicated I didn't have a life. I wanted to be that person that didn't let having kids change her life. But I also think there was a level of immaturity in there. A fear of being by myself because I wasn't sure I liked myself. By running around all the time and never allowing time to just be. Be creative. Be myself. Learn from books, from my relationships, from exploring the things I'd always wanted to do and never had time to do. I have started to discover myself and learn what I am capable of. I have had time to invest in others and really learn what it means to love them. I feel I am starting to live John 10:10, "I have come that they may have life and have it the fullest." I am experiencing deep peace, contentment, real joy, self acceptance, and a faith in God I didn't think was capable for me. This kind of depth in life is what I wish for everyone.

I get that life has crazy busy times. I can't escape that. But I don't want it to be normal for me anymore. Don't get me wrong, nothing is wrong with adventure. I LOVE adventure, but just like everything else, within proportion.

Whiplash

I was in Haiti on Monday morning talking with my friend and her fiance. By evening I was sleeping in my own bed next to my husband. I had waited two long years to go. There was an earthquake, Cholera, shootings and robberies since I had been there. There was a lot that happened in that country since I'd been last. It was different.

Then there was me. I am in the U.S. wondering what my role is. How can I help. What is my next step. What can I do. I felt lost in my relationship with Haiti and I wanted to go to sort some things out.

I leave in one day for a youth event in Indiana. My husband will be gone to camp for the weekend with his band. My daughter will come with me and my boys will be split up between two different families. There is a lot to prepare. This week my very first CD project was completed. My website is going to launch this weekend, and I got an order of 200 T-shirts that I need to prepare for my event. There is much to do.

I have three days in between my trip to Haiti and a speaking weekend. There has hardly been time to process what happened, there is too much to do in life to sit and reflect. I hope I can find those answers soon. I am experiencing a bit of the surreal. These lives are so different, and I exsist in both. In each place I carry the other with me.

What I do know is this:
* I'm OK now without the answers. I know they will come.
* I need to learn more Creole. Knowing the language is a key to success. It is the doorway to the relationships I am longing for in Haiti. It will show me, I am certain how to help.
* There is still much joy in that country.
* For all the money that was promised that hasn't been seen, many people are on the ground working for a better Haiti. A healing Haiti. Those people are your local missionaries, and non of the big wigs.
* Tent cities will be around forever. I'm not sure how any of those who live there will ever get out. Let's make it possible for their children to live in real homes.
* Much, much, much work is needed. There is much to be done. Let us not give up the fight.